Confession: Growing up, I always hated hearing about how God's love and grace were free. I mean I literally hated it. I didn't want God to love me just because. How was God's love for me special if he loved everyone else the same way? I wanted to earn His love. I wanted to deserve it. I wanted God to love me for what I could produce. (This also made me quite fearful of failure...). And sometimes, I find myself with the same mindset today.
I suppose that's quite prideful, yes? How could I ever deserve the love of God? How could I ever make myself worthy or "produce" enough? How could I ever reach His standard of holiness?
Though it was preached in February, this year's homecoming theme still speaks to me over and over again.
"Remain in me, as I also remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me.
I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing." -John 15:4-5
All I'm called to do is remain...to be attached to the vine. HE produces fruit. We bear it.
However long it took me to admit it, the truth is that my worth is not found in my performance. It's not based on my G.P.A., my efficiency, or my power of persuasion; nor is my worth depleted by my failures and shortcomings. No, my worth is found in being a child of God...and in being a branch. His grace is sufficient.
God's love simply is. I cannot earn it and I cannot lose it. It is unconditional.
Praise God.
I pray that day by day God will teach me to extend the same kind of love and grace to those around me...a love that is not based on performance or on what I receive in return, but a love that is. ...simply because God's love is.
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